Hayley Kiyoko, Lesbian Jesus, blesses us all with beautifully crafted pop gems about queer desire. Nobody pines like Hayley Kiyoko pines. The Knight of Cups is all about feeling your feelings SUPER HARD, which is of course very gay. How better to express her feelings than through art? The following songs are ranked by intensity of Knight of Cups energy, by which I mean how hard you think “SAME” when the song comes on and you’re daydreaming about your crush. Range of 1-10 Feels.
10. Curious
Here, our love interest displays some duplicitous 7 of Swords energy. She’s lying to herself and possibly her partners: “You say you want me/but you’re sleeping with him.” The singer, meanwhile, exudes some cool and confident Queen of Wands vibes, “I can handle things/like I wish that you would.” The video and the song indicate less that the singer wants her love interest back, and more that she wants her love interest to know what she’s missing. You know where to find me: writhing on the floor with a few close friends. 2/10 Feels.
9. Let it Be
“I miss you/I love you/so it’s really hard to see/we just gotta let it be.” A breakup song in which the singer learns to move forward with grace. This is the moment the Knight of Cups experiences an epiphany that marks a transition into a more self-assured, chillaxed Queen of Cups. A perfect closing song for the album. 3/10 Feels.
8. Girls Like Girls
“Girls like girls like boys do, nothing new!” Indeed. The song is a simple statement of fact, with the “stealing kisses from your missus” giving it a cheeky edge. The slightly relaxed air of “Saw your face/heard your name/gotta get with you” lacks intensity, although crushing that hard that fast is very Knight of Cups. This is a fine coming out jam. The song alone would be last in the ranking, but the video is 95% yearning glances, which bumps it up. 4/10 Feels.
7. What I Need
Knight of Cups 4 Knight of Pentacles reversed. Our Knight wants a girl who can commit and be honest about her feelings! “I only want a girl who ain’t afraid to love me.” The love interest here embodies the qualities of the Knight of Pentacles out of balance — instead of being reliable, she is too stubborn to admit when something (Hayley Kiyoko) shakes up her world. If she rights herself, she could be the steadfast lover our Knight of Cups dreams of: “What I need is for you to be sure.” If the video is anything to go by, there’s hope! 5/10 Feels.
6. Gravel to Tempo
With lyrics like “I don’t feel adequate/thinking I’m a monster in disguise” and “I thought I was depressed/but I think I just needed to cry,” this is some moody stuff! It’s also an empowerment anthem. If you gotta dance like Gina Linetti in front of the cool girls, then go for it! Headphones girl is down. “Lost in this feeling/I don’t ever need a reason.” Hell no you don’t need a reason! A refusal to be ashamed of your feelings. 6/10 Feels.
5. I Wish
The verses are all Knight of Wands bravado: “You don’t like that I do what I want like all the time.” But the bittersweet chorus reveals the yearning Knight of Cups heart underneath the swagger: “I wish I wish I wish I found love.” The video is truly a gift. Using a mysterious potion to exorcise your heartbreak through dance is very Knight of Cups. 7/10 Feels.
4. Mercy/Gatekeeper
Ok, so turns out Hayley Kiyoko wrote this song when suffering from Post-Concussion Syndrome? However, with or without that context, we have lyrics like: “All I wanna do is cry/that’s all I wanna do,” “Just give me mercy/‘cause I keep hurting hurting.” In the Gatekeeper section, the singer swings wildly in the other direction, trying to control her feelings completely: “Nobody can poison my feelings if they’re never revealed.” Maybe reveal… some of them? 7/10 Feels.
3. Wanna Be Missed
Another song in which our singer wants a girl who loves her as intensely as she loves them. “I wanna be missed/like every night/I wanna be kissed/like it’s the last time/say you can’t eat, can’t sleep, can’t breathe without me.” Her love is all-consuming, and she needs to be wanted that badly in return. She can’t just give give give all the time! 8/10 Feels.
2. Sleepover
Just brooding over your straight (?) best friend, NBD. This is the quintessential queer rite of passage. This one combines heavy Knight of Cups pining with a hearty side of 7 of Cups, as the singer spins out fantasies about a million wonderful things that are never going to happen. Rather than call the question or move on, the singer wallows in unrequited love. “And it breaks my heart/I do this every single time.” Oh no, a destructive emotional cycle! You don’t say! There but for the grace of Lesbian Jesus go I. 9/10 Feels.
1. Feelings
I mean, duh. You knew this one was coming, right? This is THE Knight of Cups song. “I over-communicate and feel too much/I just complicate it when I say too much.” Yes, you do! Also dancing around a cute girl like “look at all these feelings I have,” making her smile, and then running away is quite a move! (Side note: this video is the lesbian equivalent of the gas station scene from cinematic masterpiece Magic Mike XXL). I, too, am hooked on all these feelings. 10/10 Feels.
Now do yourself a favor and just go listen to Expectations all the way through.